Marriage can be
one of the most comforting as well as distressing experiences
of life. It can be very comforting if we have learnt the art
of accommodation and very distressing if we have not. It is
bliss if an atmosphere of mutual respect and support prevails.
It is traumatic if one of the spouses wants to impose and
enforce views on the other.
If anything that
can really make a marriage work, in fact work wonders, it is
the attitude the spouses adopt towards one another. Seldom are
two people alike and expecting that marriages of only
like-minded people succeed is a failed assumption. It is how
the two behave and conduct themselves with one another that
make a heaven or hell of marriage. Many things can be said in
It is certainly
not easy for two people to live together and perhaps is the
biggest trial of a person’s moral conduct. We may pose to be
very ethical, fair and decent before the world, but do we
really behave like this in our homes? Is our spouse happy with
us? Is he or she living in comfort and with peace of mind? Can
we judge that we are successful marriage partners?
A simple litmus
test can reveal the answer: If your spouse wishes to live with
you even in the Hereafter or to marry you again if now given
the choice, then you have passed the “Successful Spouse” test.
If this is not
the case, then we need to do some serious soul searching and
pretty soon too.