Marriage and Culture
Islamic Customs and Etiquette
Question asked by .
Answered by Dr. Shehzad Saleem

I’m a Muslim woman from UAE and my life was as people would say open because I lived in so many different places and I’ve known different people (girls and guys). A black American man wants to marry me and he is converting to Islam (not for me) because he believes that it is the right religion. I don’t mind marrying him for he is a very good friend and a respectful man. The problem is the culture and the family that will not agree to this marriage. I would like to ask you if it is prohibited for me to marry him. Would it be okay to go against what my family says?


There are two aspects to your question that need separate attention. As far as the Sharī‘ah is concerned, the consent of the parents regarding marriage is not necessary though it is highly desirable. If a couple thinks that the parents are being unreasonable, they can go ahead by taking the state into confidence, though they should try their utmost to convince them. So marrying the person you are talking about is certainly not prohibited. The second aspect is cultural. Here one must rely on one’s common sense, experience and advice of the elders because there is no fixed answer. It varies from case to case. The golden rule here is that there are no golden rules. Obviously, to marry within the same cultural section seems most appropriate since there may be adjustment problems otherwise, but then this is not always the case.

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